01

Yesterday, in my usual incredibly well-organised fashion, Brian, Alice and I went to Port Fairy (about ten minutes west of Koroit, but at the meeting point of the Moyne River and the Southern Ocean, a lovely little town) to share in the annual barbecue/picnic that our local Corps has.

Trouble was, I had the date wrong. By twenty-five days. We are supposed to celebrate Australia Day over there (our version of your Independence Day or the Queen's Birthday for the Brits.) and I have the date totally wrong. Alright, yes, I managed to get the year right, and even the month, and the hour, but talk about being a sandwich short of a picnic, or a snag (sausage) short of a BBQ (barbecue).

The rest was, happily, flawless. The weather was perfect, the flies very seldom noisome, the food very good, the pageantry from the River wonderful, and there was even a fantastic market on for us to peruse.

I've sent Nita some photographs, there was a whale boat which had at its prow a piper in full kilt playing a beautiful selection on his bagpipes. Various fishing vessels. Our local glider where one can buy flights.

The market, to get back on to the topic of writing, was great. One gentleman has a paying hobby of dissecting aluminium drink cans and making them into aeroplanes with propellors that spin in the wind.

Another air-sprayed temporary tattoos. There were a couple of stalls with mineral specimens and Alice was able to hold a large beryl crystal in marbled light green. I told her that if it was gem quality, it would be an emerald. Unfortunately, that didn't mean too much to her, so I'll have to take her to a jewellers and show her what emeralds can really look like.

We bought a few kilos of home-grown apricots, even though Brian expressed doubt that we would get through them all. I think he'd forgotten that it's my favourite fruit. So I went to another market this morning before Church, and bought another few kilos from the same bloke. Well, we had managed to munch our way through half of the original lot, and, as I said to Brian, this will probably be our only chance until next Summer to get real fruit as opposed to apricot shaped cardboard. He bought it. The fruit was even cheaper than Materia's too!

I was really blessed in that one of the stalls was the smoked eel and eel pate of local fame.

I purchased another smoked eel. I had bought from this stall holder twice before and knew I wouldn't be disappointed as to quality. Brian expressed surprise at my liking them, and I was surprised that he didn't know. Alice loves the stuff too, so it's going to be a fight tomorrow over who gets the lions share.

The great thing about this was that Brian HAD to relax. He's been working flatchat lately, getting around four hours sleep a night (and that doesn't include time off for my snoring) and then it's back into the thick of things.

It was also our thirteenth wedding anniversary, so I was really chuffed that we had a great time as a family (the boys decided they would celebrate New Years Eve getting plastered somewhere else and then sleep it off at a friend's, so we didn't really see them). Even Mowgli had a great time, with many a person getting very sooky over him, much to his obvious delight.

We've had days of incredible weather variability - steaming hot, just plain hot, cool and cool with rain. All within a week.

Russell, Aaron's boss, is irrigating things madly as his paddocks dry out, and yet ours are still green. Weird.

I've been getting an attack of the guilts because this is supposed to be about homesteading, and we're not exactly your model self-sufficiency touts.

I'm pleased to report that the pigeons are currently feeding ten babies.

That's about it in that department, at least as far as the Heavenly Hovel is concerned.

So, to make up a bit, here are some handy hints:

I know this is probably ludicrous given that the Northern Hemisphere is in the midst of Winter, but think of it as a great way to get a jump on Spring/Summer -

From Earth Garden magazine, no. 93, Jackie French writes, "Lettuce wreaks a terrible revenge on anyone who neglects it. It becomes bitter if its growth is checked in any way, or else it bolts to seed. Too little water, too little feeding, or too hot a summer all can contribute to a lettuce failure.

"Lettuce seed can either be sown in a pot and transplanted, or scattered in place and thinned out. In hot weather it's best to sow them where they are to be grown, as transplanting can cause them to go bitter (I warned you that lettuce was temperamental. If you do transplant in hot weather, cut the tops off to reduce transpiration and loss of moisture). Don't worry, more leaves will grow back.

"Keep the soil moist, either with a very thin scattering of sawdust, very fine grass clippings or even by spreading shade cloth over it to stop a hard crust forming. Letuuce seeds may not germinate at over 30 degrees C. Don't panic. Spread the seeds on wet blotting paper, cover with another sheeep of wet blotting paper and keep them in a plastic bag in the fridge for two or three days, then scrape them carefully onto the soil, cover and keep moist.

"Stagger your lettuce plantings. Lettuce doesn't like competition. Make sure the soil is well weeded and there aren't other plants crowding it. If lettuce is too crowded it may grow slowly (and become bitter) or too much humidity will turn the lettuce slimy.

"On the other hand, lettuce do seem to like being crowded together (just not with other plants) and are sweeter and more tender if they are shoulder to shoulder with their friends. I plant lettuce about as far apart as the width of my hand.

"Keep lettuce seedlings mulched. This will help keep the soil cool and moist and help feed them. Well mulched lettuce are much less likely to turn bitter or "bolt" to seed.

"Water every second day, or every day in hot weather, preferably in the evening - hot, wet lettuce can rot.

"Lettuce have shollow roots so need excellent feeding and frequent watering if they're not to be "set back" and turn bitter. Lettuce is best VERY well mulched and fed every week with home made liquid fertiliser, rich in all sortos fo things, not just nitrogen. As it's so shallow rooted it can be planted in a very shllow trech of compost iwth good results. Avoid using fresh raw manure - it may cause puffiness and also appear to attract pests to lettuce. Old cow manure or wilted comfrey make excellent mulches for lettuce.

"A good way to grow lettuc is to dig a small shallow trench about half a finger depth and plant your seedlings. The, as they grow, fill in the trench with compost or sieved old manure. If you don't have compost, feed your seedlings with a sprinkle of blood and bone or old hen manure - say two kg per 30 metres of row.

"You can also feed lettuce every week with liquid manure, either a commercial variety or home made. I cover weeds with water ina bucket with a led and add either alittle blood and bone, hen manure or fresh urine. Scoop off the liquid and water well. Another easy liquid manure is made by covering compost with water. Compost water is also good to combat rotting lettuce.

"Lettuce tolerates acidic to alkaline soil. If your soil is very acid, a gentle sprinkle of lime or dolomite will help your lettuces flourish. Wood ash will add potash as well as neutralising the soil. Sprinkle gently as though you were seiving icing sugar onto a cake."

Moving

"Mum! I need another box!

We've run out of boxes!"

"Who's got the black marker?"

"No, you had it last!"

"Don't put that in there!"

"Let me explain again what

the word 'fragile' means."

"What's in this one?

And why is it tinkling?"

"Has anyone seen the dog?"